Sunday, October 30, 2011

Brewing Thoughts


The family and I were having dinner earlier at this really nice restaurant called Casa Marikit in Lipa City when we noticed the waiters going up to the second floor of the restaurant to deliver three bouquets of roses for a lady sitting alone in the veranda. Trailing behind the waiters was this guy holding a single white rose with a ribbon tied on to the stem. From the looks of it, a proposal awaits.

I wonder how it feels like to be in that girl’s position, to sit unknowingly in that table, waiting for your boyfriend to arrive with a question in hand. Pretty tough I presume. I’ve never actually thought of my wedding to be honest. Like how or where it’ll be. Marriage has crossed my mind a number of times, but the actually wedding has always been a blur or was something I considered to be a surprise. What crossed my mind more often than marriage or weddings was the idea of being alone…forever. Haha. I think there is greater fear in ending up alone than having someone like Jonah Hill for a husband. But then again, I think I’d like Jonah Hill. He’s funny.

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Two days ago, I got the chance to visit the public cemetery here in Batangas. I can’t remember the last time I’ve been to a public cemetery or if I’ve ever been to one. I’ve always been used to the vast green gardens of Eternal Gardens where the mausoleums look like real houses (even better sometimes) and where people go to have picnics and afternoon bike rides. Call me disrespectful or whatever but public cemeteries seem to miss the point why cemeteries even exist – to find a place for the dead where they can rest in peace. I understand that anything that’s public or government-owned is likely to be unmaintained, crowded, grimy and generally substandard, but maybe a part of me was hoping cemeteries could be an exception to this. The tombstones were like huge cobblestones that people step on to, as if no one’s buried under that stone. Most of the tombstones don’t even have names written on them to indicate who lies there. And while some do have well-written tombstones, they’re already covered with moss, dead leaves, dried tree branches, random trash and melted candles. I’m writing this down because it just looks disturbing to me, especially when I compare it to the ones I see in private cemeteries where there is enough space for each dead person to “breathe” or even roll around the grass or soil if they want to.

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I want a tattoo. And maybe a dog too, but a tattoo seems more probable at this time. I’ve been scanning through Tumblr and found some great designs that I can probably tweak a bit to make them seem more personal.


I figured I can’t have the huge, dark looking ones since I don’t really enjoy seeing skulls or spiky vines on my skin. But then I was also contemplating if I should get a cutesy one like this bunny because getting something like this might just officially epitomize my pacute-ness. Ugh. I can’t be pacute forever. Pacute days must die and must not be seen in my future tattoos. What story will I tell my children about this bunny tattoo, that I was once (and probably still am) a pacute little girl? I wanted a watermelon, but it still looks childish right? It’s just that I’ve always associated that fruit with summer and I love the summer season. Mmm.

Must.Resist.Totoro :-<

I’m still thinking of something, anything that describes me or at least tells a story about me. I want my first to have a story, to have an epic tale behind it. Okay so maybe not so epic, but something really personal feel to it. So friends, help me! Help me with my story so I can get inked soon. I’m not sure why I want this, but I just I know I do.

As for the dog, I just watched Hachi: A Dog’s Tale and a dog really looked a great friend, a forever ally. It seems so comforting to go home every day with someone or something like that to greet you.

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